Are you done laughing at my title? Good, now I'll explain.
When I was a young person trying to make a decision about who I was deep down inside, there were no (really!!) role models that were gay. There were no acceptable gay people, there were only the people you heard about compared to pedophiles and sickos.
I still remember 4 and 1/2 years ago when I was still trying to make a decision as to who I was as a 32 year old woman, there were very few people I could look to as responsible role models for this life. Sure there's Ellen, and while I love her, she is not enough on her own to help me decide what to do with my life.
Last night when I watched Glee (yes, I watch and I loooovvvveee) I cried when Santana and Brittany sang with Gwyneth Paltrow. I cried harder when Santana cried. I was almost balling by the time she begged Brittany "I love you. Tell me you love me back, please!" The Diva said "I don't understand" when Santana was crying during the song. The reason she was crying is because she was scared and she didn't know what to do. I felt all those things a very short time ago when my beautiful C said "I love you, Tell me you love me. Please!!" I was scared and I pushed her away for about two weeks before I made my decision. I hurt her and I still feel guilt for that. But we are together, and I am forever blessed by her presence in my life.
I say all that to say this, if Glee had been around when I was a teen I probably would never have married a man. I hate to be that blunt, but I know this is the life I was meant to live and there are times when I wholeheartedly wish C was the only one I had ever been with. We need to support our gay youth, and it has gotten so much better in certain places. It still needs to get better, but with continued shows like this and positive young people I have full faith that it will!
Please continue to support any youth you know that may be going through this turmoil, I know I would have given anything for a comforting shoulder!!
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